Ryan once had to write a paper for his university English class about the importance of home.
His thesis was “Home is not a place but rather a feeling.”
Home : It’s all I could think about today.
I find myself far from home in a place I never expected to be in for so long.
It is now, for all intents and purposes, my new temporary home.
I am not sure how I feel about that.
Of course …this community has been a godsend. The residents have been incredibly kind and loving. They have embraced us from the very beginning and we have felt such comfort as well as a sense of belonging.
But they know full well that I don’t want to be here. That I long to be back in Beaumont with my daughters and my husband. To wake in my own space, to have moments of quiet or even quite simply to do something other than search.
And while Home may be a state of mind, I miss everything and everyone in it. Before all of this.
Yet…when the time comes to leave this place, I will miss it for all its joy, blessings and ultimately its tragedy.
Today the winter season for Sun Peaks comes to a close. Everything will be quieter and slower. In a perfect world, Ryan would be packing up and making his way home. His year of adventure finished but filled with a lifetime of memories.
With that in mind….we took time to enjoy our temporary home. A group of 12 of us, took the chairlift up and walked down. The steepness of the run made traversing it challenging. Oh my, the fun we had. I felt such lightness that on most days escapes me.
This was Scott’s doing.
We are, of course, always searching but Scott gave us a way to do that and have some moments of joy. My husband has learned that a home cannot survive pain and sorrow, without equal amounts of love and laughter.
So when it is time to leave here…the home I return to will most certainly be different then when I left. My son will not be there. I am terrified of what that will mean. @ Sun Peaks Resort