Humans are such complex creatures, it is almost impossible to understand their reasons for being. We have learned to define each other by a complicated set of life rules that gives us the ability to place each person in a box of preconception.

One of them is character.

Character will always be defined by your actions. It is the intention that comes within your soul that provide others the opportunity to know who you are and what you stand for. It is then up to Society to attribute traits to your actions in order to better establish your place in our culture.

Seems complicated and exacting. With plenty of opportunity to get it wrong.

However in the midst of of all that confusion is this absoluteness. The sum of ones life can be tallied through the choices they have made.

This past weekend was the 6 month anniversary of Ryan’s disappearance. I’m not sure why this one day seemed more grievous or tragic than the day before or quite possibly the day after. Only that it was.

Left on our own, perhaps we would have settled into a mindset of pondering our son’s choices up until February 17th. How selfish and cruel to Ryan whose intention would never have been the end result.


The support and unyielding love we have been surrounded with from the beginning circled around us yet again.

In the most unexpected way.

We were honored to have 8 of Ryan’s friends come to the lake, celebrating and remembering our son, their friend. What an amazing group of men. Destined to do great things in this world. Strong, bright, intelligent men that love my son dearly. And despite the grievous loss they have suffered, it was important for them to come and spend the day with us.

Saturday we were invited to attend Ryan’s rugby team. After the game, we had the privilege of being presented with Ryan’s Jersey, framed. We now find ourselves included into a new family of individuals that respected our son.

Ryan, you never really had a chance to show the world the whole of your worth. Well not entirely.

But who you are thus far, has captivated so many.

When the character of a man is not clear to you, look at his friends. – Japanese proverb