The last 3 1/2 years have taken their toll. I know that. It hurts my soul to know that our desire to search and connect with Ryan has been hampered by COVID and now forest fires. But that is just a temporary measure. I know that as well.
I look around with such sadness at the people impacted by life events in the past two years.
There has been so much grief and so much trauma. Journeys dissimilar to one another except for the intense feelings of loss.

How we choose to process our trauma therefore should be unique to us and unquantifiable. Some, like me share; share my words, share my grief and share my burden. It is for me, the most important self care I can do because sitting in silence waiting for someone to notice or reach out, places an impossible responsibility on lives already heavy with duty.
Some experiencing grief or trauma hold their emotions close to them because sharing leaves them feeling more vulnerable.

It is not all the same. Not all trauma will be experienced in the same manner. People operate based on their own knowledge and personal experience. What might be the worse pain I’ve felt so far will be different than yours. And that should be okay. After all the horrors this world holds, do we really want others to experience the magnitude of it all to come to our place of understanding?

Maybe we are the gatekeepers of this new knowledge of grief and as such carry a burden that no one else can know until it comes to them. We should be kinder. We should be more empathic. We should lessen our expectations on what others should or shouldn’t do. We should hold less judgment.

Love others through these initial moments because the one thing we all can acknowledge … that moment when our worlds came crashing down.