I think we are in a constant state of forgiveness. Wanting to be forgiven, asking for forgiveness or deciding whether to forgive or not.
This past month I have struggled to forgive myself.
You don’t have to be a parent to doubt the absoluteness of the love or even the time you have given to another. You just have to be human.
In the early days, I was in this dark place where I begged Ryan for forgiveness. I was sorry I had cross words. I apologized for the times you asked for me to play and I didn’t. I wished desperately for time to be rewound when you wanted to tell me some important story that you were so excited about. Why was I so busy?
And then a new and now dearest friend told me “No one is perfect. You are human. If you don’t judge Ryan for that night , he won’t judge you.”
And in that moment, I can proudly say that not one day went by in any of my children’s lives that I did not say “I love you.
It does not matter where you go or what you do, there will always be two people that will love you unconditionally. “
I was not perfect. Tomorrow I will not be perfect. When this is all said and done , perfection will still elude me.
I can live with that.
But for me, forgiveness is the final act of love. @ Sun Peaks Resort
