Heather’s Blog

12 weeks…..

God who knew? Who could guess this would be my reality? Who knew that Sun Peaks would become a prison of expectation and cruel reality?

I can still vividly see our last weekend. I didn’t know. I wasn’t aware that it would be my last moment of true happiness and peace. I didn’t treasure it, didn’t value it or even recognize it.

Because it wasn’t extraordinary.

It was my normal.

We were invited to dinner. Our dear friends John and Stevens were up from Calgary and staying at Niki and Brandon’s. Bailey, Nicole and Brian joined us for supper. It was like old times. We dined and drank and toasted to new beginnings. We laughed with our recollections of memories past. It was fun. It was normal.

In the middle, a Snapchat came from Lyette. Odd. We haven’t talked in a bit. Sure we “like” everything but not Snapchat worthy.

“Heather, my beautiful friend. I just want you to know I love looking at your posts. I can see you on TV. Maybe a blog. Maybe something with food. Thinking of you.”

Ahhh so sweet. I loved hearing from her. You see, I admired this woman so much, I was in awe she reached out. Unexpected.

It was a beautiful evening.

I didn’t know.

I went to bed. I slept the peaceful dreams of someone who had it all and had everything to look forward to.

It was such a lie.

The next day was filled with ringette. Both girls had games. Jordyn had two. The day spent driving back and forth seemed never ending.

At 915 pm, we finally got home.

At 930, our lives changed forever.

“Heather, Ryan never came home last night. He didn’t show up for work today. We filed a missing police report.”

Never have words swarmed before me and caused such deep, all consuming fear.

We left for Sun Peaks that night at 1100. I don’t remember the drive. It was fast. It was too slow. I prayed. I begged. I negotiated.

Please let this be okay.

As the night wore on and the sun began its steady rise , I knew.

My life, as I knew it was over.

That, I would readily accept but never in my world would I have thought the price would be my only son.

The time draws near, I think. Like a chrysalis. We will leave behind this tragic journey and begin anew.

Missing something vital.

I am ready.

I am not.